SUNSHINE AURA – self-esteem. self-love. self-actualization. 

Every now and then, I like to take a pause from writing poems and little stories. Sometimes, I like to just meditate a bit on how I’m feeling, because chances are, I’m not alone.

Lately everything feels really difficult. Like every person I deal with is not cooperating. Every task I have feels monumentally harder than it should be. Things that I usually can complete in a week or less are taking me two weeks or more. It just feels hard. I’m trying not to act on emotion. I’m trying to reign in the highs and lows and find balance. Or, create balance if it doesn’t exist already. Do you feel that way right now?

My list of responsibilities continues to grow, and I continue to desire hiding out. I procrastinate to avoid the pain of dealing with difficult people and situations. I sit out on the sidelines to avoid facing the people I fear I am letting down. I know what I need to do to make lasting change in my life, but I just choose easy distractions instead.

It’s like Ed Sheeran’s “Bad Habits” on repeat over here. It could be the change of the season coming, or a reflection of energy in the cosmos. Whatever it is, I feel like I’m in a loop and I know what I need to do to get out, but I just choose to stay and repeat the same bad habits.

If you feel this way right now, or feel this way from time to time, I won’t tell you I have a solution. Because I don’t. But I will tell you, it’s OK to not have it all figured out. It’s OK to take things one day at a time. You don’t have to solve all your problems overnight, and honestly, you will never be able to do that. You can steadily progress and just do a little better each day. The progress you make today will stack upon yesterday’s and so on, each little brick adding another stepping stone to your path.

Hang in there. With love,

Kayla